Look, as a career criminal there are certain things that just bother me about retailers. For starters, I think I’ve made it very clear that I don’t want to work and I’d appreciate it if your stores would not make it so difficult for me to get things. I clearly don’t have money, so every time you use a Checkpoint Tag, you’re literally taking the clothes right off of my back. So, in order to stay warm in the winter and cool in the summer, these are the reasons why I avoid stores that take loss prevention seriously.
1. I Can’t Carry all the Extra EquipmentSeriously man, I only have enough room for the stuff I want to steal in my bag. If I’m in a store that’s putting Security Tags on Clothes, I have to bring pliers, or magnets and all sorts of aluminum foil to *try and bypass the tags. All that extra junk makes me stick out and really takes up space in my booster bag.
2. I Like to be in and outNothing frustrates me more than spending tons of time trying to steal one single item. I prefer stores that are “LP dumb”. I can stuff my bag and pants with no worries about an alarm going off at the door. The quicker I can get out of there, the better. Checkpoint Tags really slow me down. It would really help me out if you guys didn’t use them.
3. I Hate When I’m NoticedNothing grinds my gears more than an employee seeing me messing with one of the Security Tags on Clothes. They always call a manager and they always ask me to leave. That’s terrible shoplifter service if you ask me. I hate trying to remove the tags myself since it brings so much unwanted attention to me. I love stores that don’t apply any EAS. I just grab what I want and steal away!
4. I Can’t Grab and RunI am great and grab and runs! My favorite pastime is walking into a store, grabbing an entire rack of this season’s hottest outfit and running right out the front door. This way, I can sell the sizes I don’t need to all my shoplifter friends and dozens of places online. How else do you think I eat? I did a grab and run this one time at a store that used Checkpoint Tags, well the ones with ink in them and it ruined everything. All my shoplifting buddies made fun of me and they called me “Stealing Smurf” for the better part of 5 years. I’ve learned my lesson. Only steal clothes that are completely unprotected.
5. JailFirst of all, I’m too pretty for jail. Second, I’ve yet to find any honor amongst my criminal friends. Third, I would have to call my mom to come bail me out, again. It’s bad enough I still live in the basement. But seriously, every time I see a store that puts Security Tags on Clothes, I jus turn around. There’s a good chance I’ll get caught and arrested and I’m just not about that life. So, please, I beg of you, stop securing your stuff. There are people who depend on you not doing it to survive.
Clothing Security is important and we can help you with it. Call 1.866.914.2567 and let’s talk.